(((elsewhere…)))

still a bit fixated on finishing the mental health document ((which is now actually finished)). not all that different from website building — interesting to contemplate, describe, dive in, learn, watch(ing) something new come into existence, compulsion to finish, mild(?) obsession until.
managed to finish coffee (with a bit of cinnamon (sure i jacked up that spelling ((no i didn’t!))) for once before starting this (rare).

thoughts, sensations, perceptions — phenomena…
whatever is written or spoken is tantamount ((not actually sure of the definition, but i think it fits)) to describing the front row of people (those most immediately visible) in a packed, potentially infinite stadium)

breathe… notice… rest in awareness…
(did i choose their seats? do i even really choose how they’re ultimately expressed? do i choose what is noticed? what catches the senses? when? how? why?)


open, aware, present… whatever is happening… (attention shifting back and forth between this and environmental sounds — vacuum, pill bottle, footsteps ((i apparently defaulted to adding a space between “foot” and “steps” while handwriting… no idea how to demonstrate via visible editing that a space was removed)), movement of… objects? thinking? just… move-ment?)… nothing excluded… here/now/this…
(maybe yesterday’s can be posted… what’s the fear/hesitation? that mentioning the VA and its provisions might be seen (perceived by others as) some sorting of “humble brag” pointing toward military service / disabled veteran status, perhaps inviting questions i’m not sure i’d want to answer…)

being is enough…
(there’s that “is it though?” again)

… an unconditional yes to experiencing it/at all…
(to the bat-mobile! (the document (laugh)((😂))

(love) 💕